S.W.A.M.P. Team

Good morning.  Captain Smitty at your service here to tell you about the new S.W.A.M.P. Team I'm heading up.  That's S.W.A.M.P.:  Strategic Whiskers And Mouse Patrol Team.  The team was activated this morning, and I'll tell you all about it in a minute.  But first, I want to introduce you to the team.  This is me, Captain Smitty.  This is my I'm-Always-At-The-Ready pose.

Be sure to take note of my menacing dagger-like claws.  My paws are deadly weapons, and I have to register and license them for the safety of the general public.  You understand, don't you?

This is my "Kill" pose.  Don't be scared.  You're a friend.  I'll keep you safe from marauding bands of mousies.

This is my partner, Gracie.  She's working deep undercover these days, and so this is all I can show you.  If you saw her face, I'd have to attack you with my scary dagger-like claws.  Believe me.  You don't want to know the horror of it.

So I suppose you're wondering why the team was activated.  Here's the story:

My family lives in this house in the remote countryside.  The house is built wedged into the ground with a daylight basement.  This picture was taken before I came to live here.  If I'd had my way, things would have been built differently, but you don't get to choose your family or your house.  (Actually, some cats do that, but the food is pretty good around here, so for now, I stay.)

So when you live in the country, and your house is halfway under ground, you have critters.  There are gophers, squirrels, raccoons, moles, voles, and last, but not least, mousies.  I'm doing my very best to hunt them all down and play with them until they are dead, but a guy can only do so much.  

Last night my mom and dad were standing in the sewing room (which us underground) and they heard banging and crashing in the furnace closet, and then the sound of running feet in the ceiling overhead.  So, this morning, the S.W.A.M.P. Team was activated.

In fact, there's the alarm now!  CAPTAIN SMITTY, ON MY WAY, SIR!

Step aside.  Let a pro handle this.  

Hmmmmmmmm.  I think I smell those little buggers up here.

It's a tight squeeze, but I'm checking back here too. 

Hm.  Do you see that white dot?  That's looking purretty suspicious to me.  What do you think?

I've thoroughly investigated, and I'm declaring it ALL CLEAR.  Only for now, though.

Rest assured, Captain Smitty will remain on high alert until those pesky varmints have been captured and contained.  

14 comments from clever and witty friends:

Colleen said...

I love the adventures of Smitty! He would make a great character for a childrens book! Merry Christmas Smitty!

Quilting Babcia said...

Ah Smitty! Consigned to basement duty again are ye! Don't they know that mousies also love to climb Christmas trees and nibble on the popcorn strings?!

Sheila said...

I love to hear the adventures of Smitty and Gracie. Life in the country is a good thing. Hopefully, I never have to move back to suburbia. Merry Christmas!

Lee said...

Ahhh, love these Smitty Tails(Tales);) Great acronym too S.W.A.M.P. Now go swamp those mousies Captain Smitty, and get Gracie to help you!

quiltzyx said...

I know you're going to do a great job Smitty. Keep up the good work (even if Mom does do that "EEEEK!!!" thing)!

WoolenSails said...

He is quite the character and enjoyed his adventures today.


Teresa in Music City said...

Ahhhhh! I will sleep so much more soundly tonight knowing that Captain Smitty - my Hero!!! - is standing guard over the deadly mousies population! *fainting from adoration*

Denise :) said...

I totally do think your could write children's stories about the adventures of Smitty. Seriously. And I too love the SWAMP acronym!! Too cute!! :)

Rachel said...

Smitty, thanks for the giggles! I needed that!

Angel and Kirby said...

Good luck, Captain Smitty. We know you will have those mousies in paw, soon!

Lyndsey said...

Hi Captain Smitty, Picasso said he can be your man in London. Only last night he had to scale the ladder into the attic to check that no mousies had invaded. He's still not sure what the bumps and bangs were but could have been Santa practising landing his sleigh on the roof. Have a great Christmas and looking forward to hearing the continuing tales of the top mousing team.

Cheryl's Teapots2Quilting said...

Don't forget the cheese, Capt Smitty! Meeces love cheeses.

kc said...

Your home is beautiful - and looks like the S.W.A.M.P. is doing a bang-up job! Any way we could borrow the Patrol for a few days? We were having the zoo dinner party in the classroom, when over our heads arose such a clatter! All the keepers looked at each other with wonder in their eyes, but the education staff just laughed, shrugged their shoulders & shouted out "RATS!"

We suggested putting a couple of snakes up there, but it was reported that they already had tried that. Apparently our snakes have lost their hunting instincts...or maybe the rats just outsmarted 'em. I dunno, but the snakes are back in their exhibits and the rats are runnin' around!

Kate said...

Thanks for more adventures of Captain Smitty, he's my favorite cat character!