Good morning, and Happy Halloween! Smitty here with some impurrtant news about my new gig.
Already, I do a lot of the work around the Three Cats Ranch. There are only two cats here, and so I have to pick up the slack for the missing cat. My many jobs entail
(Ha! Get it? EnTAIL?) Comedian, obviously. But seriously, my many jobs include chief guard cat and vermin extermination,
Furee motion quilting consultant,
With furrst right of refusal on all designs
Race car driver (No car necessary. Silly, cats do not have driver's licenses),
and cabinet reorganizer...a place for everything, and everything in its place.
Generally keeping the riff raff away,
Resident stoner...it's okay, we live in a legal state.
Gracie's old, so she can't be counted on fur anything...you know what I'm saying? She's just like my mom...born during the 14th Century.
Yeah, don't even get me started.
So, yesterday, Mom added a new gig to my list of things to do...Nude Model.
It's true that my phyurrsique is well suited to this job. Just check out those glutes!
So, with all of that to do, I refused to inspect the quilt she finished this morning. She laid it on the floor for me, but I just sat on my pole. Nothin' doin', I said. A cat has to put his paw down somewhere, you know?
She put it on the table, no doubt so that I could use it for a napping place. She says I'm not supposed to get on the table. Hahahahahahahahahahaha. I just figure, don't put a bed there if you don't want me to sleep on it. Sheesh. Humans can be so hard to figure out.
But getting back to this new gig she had in store for me, she wants to make my pawtrait. Fur sure, I need to keep an eye on this to make sure she does it propurrly.
She chose one of my better photographs. Yes, I think this will do purrfectly.
Furrst, she needs to use the propurr tools, including this Ultra Fine Point Sharpie...because I'm an ultra fine cat, and so that figures.
Recently she made a pawtrait of Gracie, and she used a fat point pen. And Gracie's a fat cat, so it just makes sense, right?
And she's going to need her light box, and so I turned that on fur her. I'm very helpful that way.
These are her fabrics. Even when I'm not available for purrsonal inspection, I keep my eyes and ears open at all times, sending in my minions when necessary.
Do you remember that movie the Eyes of Laura Mars?
Think of this as the Eyes of Smitty Purrs. I suppose next, she'll want me to be making movies in Hollywood.
And just because she needs me to be sniffing out vermin, she put the nose on right away.
Speaking of vermin, Gracie heard something in the ceiling and turned on her x-ray eyes. (With cats, it's all about the eyes.)
So I had to abandon my job as a nude model and go hunting in the ceiling. Like I said...a cat's work is never done.
While I was sniffing out the vermin, my mom finished all my angel purrts.
Today, she'll start on my dark side.
And after a hard day at work, Gracie and I spent some time next to the warm furr.
It's a cat's life, I'm telling you.