Climbing High

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Good morning. Smitty here.

I've been hanging around here for days waiting for my mom to get off the computer so that I could tell you what's been going on. And it's been bad, let me tell you. Gracie and I submitted to the biggest insult of all time this weekend. My mom and my dad went off camping and they left Gracie and me at home! And that's not the worst of it! They put Gracie in the basement and closed the door, and they left me to patrol the upper levels of the house...by myself!!! They said it was so I didn't jump on Gracie, and Gracie agreed with their evil plan. And I'll just say right here and now that the entire weekend sucked gophers. Yeah, big suckage here.

I'll admit that sometimes I jump on Gracie, but how can I help myself when she's lying there looking so delectable? I mean, who could resist all that pillowy softness?

Am I right about that or what?

But that's not the worst of it. I had to sit by the window and watch all the intruders in the yard the whole danged day! And wouldn't that just waggle your whiskers? Like these weird looking dogs.

And these giant buzzy bugs.

And Uno! Cripes!

But the worst part was this guy. I thought I had all the squirrels chased away from the house, but here's this guy, sitting right outside big as you please. Chitting and chatting at me with his big teeth. And I'm telling you that really frosted my nostrils.

And there was nothing I could do but just gaze at the catnip outside and practice my zen. Ohmmmmmmmmmmm...and wait. And wait. And wait. 

Well, the second my mom and dad got home, I made a bee line for the catnip and took a big huff of it. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh... That is some wicked weed, heinous herb, luscious leaf.

But that just made me want to get high, and so what could I do but climb this big Douglas Fur tree?

And my mom was standing down below and she kept telling me I was gonna regret it. And she kept taunting me, asking me how I was going to get down.

And holy tuna fish. I'll admit that I wasn't sure myself.

My mom always tells me that when you find yourself too high, you gotta stop climbing. So, I started working my way down bit by bit.

The view was purretty good. Why do I always forget to bring my binoculars?

I wasn't scared. No sirree. Not me.

Finally, I made my way to this ledge thing and sat there for a while...you know...just so nobody would think I was worried or anything. But I was starting to get hungry.

And sometimes, you know...

A guy's just gotta take a leap of faith, so...


And then, I just walked away passively, just like my mom taught me.

Thanks for listening. Smitty, signing off.

26 comments from clever and witty friends:

Chris said...

Smitty, you make us laugh! Thanks for the purrfect post :-)
Maui and Jombie

Linda said...

Hi, Smitty is so darn cute!


WoolenSails said...

That poor boy, not getting all the attention of free run of the yard, must have been like a punishment, lol. I have never left my new kitties alone, have no idea what would happen, but I am sure it would involve a disaster.


Colleen said...

Smitty is so cute

Julianne said...

Smitty you are such an awesome kitty! Be nice
To Gracie!

Vroomans' Quilts said...

Smitty - you were just man of the house while your humans were gone. Gracie may look like the perfect 'bean bag' , but repect the grand dame of the house.

Sharon Sauser said...

I do think Smitty writes the best blog posts I have ever read! He has such an exciting life.

Christine M said...

What a great post, Smitty. I really enjoyed reading about your adventures!

Janarama said...

ROFLMAO! Smitty you're such a character and oh so darn cute.

Sher S. said...

OMG!! Do you realize Smitty that you were the man of the house that whole time. Your ruled!!! That tree looked mighty high but you handled it just purfect.
Sorry all those critters came visiting and you could greet them. Maybe next time. Love your blogging.

Lynda Halliger Otvos (Lynda M O) said...

Yowza, boy kitty, that's some pretty high climbing; I'm glad you were able to get down again without help. Separating you from Gracie makes sense to me, even if it doesn't to you. Mama knows best there I'm certain of it.

Always good fun to read your posts. That pink nose of yours is a sweet sweet thing.

Tilly said...

What a great story Smitty,love it.

liniecat said...

If I did Twitter and Smitty had a Twittery link -
Id follow him lolol
Hope youve had a great break away : )

Meg said...

This is the first post of yours I have read in a while. Been busy here and hopefully things are slowing down now.

Love your writing. You are good!!! Yep, those darn male cats at times don't want to leave the poor females alone. We have Levi who wouldn't leave Audrey alone - would bug her at least once a day. When we (not a word but crazily) decided to keep two of our fosters, Nellie and Gabi - it really took the attention away from Audrey who is 13. It was a good thing. Just a lot more poop. :(

Your cats have a great life there. Climbing that tree would be so fun for a cat!

Have a great weekend!


Debbie said...

Bravo, Smitty! I love your stories and antics. Thanks Barb for creating this photo story for us to enjoy.

Anonymous said...

Oh Smitty, you are a brave cat. Glad you found your way back down and that Mom had the camera handy to document your adventure.

Heidi said...

LOL funny! Great post!

Judy1522 said...

Smitty thanks for being such a funny cat. You made my day.

Jacque said...

Pawesome post, my friend! I have scratched tree climbing off my list now that I am older and more dignified, but confidentially, I sure miss the fun!

Diane Wild said...

Good thing you huffed the catnip before you went climbing. Made it all that much more enjoyable, I bet.

carla said...

Hi!!! What a fun post!!! I love the Adventures of Smitty!!!! Glad he got down ok too!!!! I miss having a cat so much!!!! Good thing Smitty is around!!!!

Brown Family said...

Smitty, it sucks when you have to stay at home all alone! But you did have a big adventure afterward!

Our Mom keeps mumbling something about her and dad taking a short trip! I hope that means they will just be gone for the day!

Tami C said...

I love hearing Smitty's adventures. You sure had some interesting visitors while mom and dad were gone. Be careful in that tree next time!

Kirsty said...

Oh Smitty, you are just adorable. Love the pics and the commentary. x

quiltzyx said...

Gosh Smitty, sorry that all those critters tortured you through the windows while Mom & Dad were gone for the weekend. If I lived nearby, I would have volunteered to hang out with you. And, yes, you do have to give Gracie a teeny bit more respect than jumping on her. Don't forget, she's older than you.
I'm glad you made it back down the tall Doug Fir. I would have been scared that high up!

Kate said...

So sorry you got locked up for the weekend Smitty, but your Mom was just looking out for you.

I don't like heights, so I would definitely have been scared of that big tree. It makes my heart flutter just watching you climb down!